You know those days when you couldn't organise a metaphor about something easy while standing in a metaphor factory... that would be today...My timing was just shithouse today... or my horoscope was misaligned... or my karma was out of whack... or SOMETHING!
Actually, I know what it was... it's Daylight Savings... yup *nods head*... has to be... anything that goes wrong for the next few days or so... Daylight Saving's fault...
Anyway, I took myself off to the sauna this afternoon... it's the last Sunday of the month, so that means it was Bears in the Mist day... but I have to say... Bears in the Mist... deader than dead... in fact approaching undeadness... so dead it's coming back the other way.
Sorry, I think I scrambled my brains with all the heat, cool, wander, heat, cool, wander I did this afternoon...
It all started well... it ended pretty well (mostly because I figured that the encounter at the end was as good a time to call it a day as any... although there were other influences)... but everything in the middle was just dead or shitty... the beginning and end were somewhat unexpected encounters though I have to say... had you lined all the possible options up and asked me to choose who was the most likely, I would never have chosen those particular two guys. Not that it was bad in either case... just unexpected.
But the parts inbetween those two events that weren't dead were a whole world of "Old Homo Week"... everywhere I turned there seemed to be somebody I knew, or have known in the biblical sense...
Firstly there was the guy I've mentioned before with the tribal tattoo on one arm and the elephant tattoo on the other... who, although I didn't realise it at the time, put on a little show with somebody else I've been Biblical with in the steam room (just the two of them doing the do and me watching... possibly I could have joined in, but they seemed to be more interested in each other than any outside interference or assistance)... who I picked up at one of the few Bear Den Nights I went to. And when I saw them outside of the steam room they were both talking to a guy that I'm SURE I used to know (but we're talking yeeeeears ago, not long after I'd moved out of home)... although I now know him more from his online profiles than in person. Then there was Hot Sweaty Monkey Sex Guy from about a million billion years ago (okay, sometime within the last, say, eight years)... so called for fairly obvious reasons, but also because I kinda threw him around like a rag doll and I don't think we said more than two words to each other the whole time he was here... I couldn't throw him around like that now though, since he's, well, spread out a bit... but then who hasn't... didn't look that bad on him actually.
There were also a couple of other guys who looked familiar although I couldn't place them... possibly I just know them from their Gaydar profiles... I dunno (hello, welcome to Adelaide, home of Two Degrees of Kevin Bacon). But speaking of Gaydar profiles, there was a guy there I've seen online in various places who was actually part of the whole "crappy timing" thing, but I'll get to that in a second.
The final nail in the "Hey, I know you" coffin came towards the end of my visit, and to be honest, was the other part of the reason I figured it was time to go. I was sitting in the spa and caught a glimpse of one of the guys as he went past... and he looked familiar, then he came back and sat down nearby. Turned out to be Fox... I'd recognise his profile (that would be his face in profile, not his internet profile) anywhere... even dimly lit, at a distance and without my glasses. He hadn't recognised me, but that was understandable, since I was lacking glasses and my hair was wet... and I did consider just making a run for it without saying hello, but I figured that would be the chickenshit way out, so I said hi, we had a brief little chat and then I made a run for it. Only to see somebody else I'd had a thing with in the locker room when I got in there. But he's working at the sauna on and off now, so that one wasn't that surprising.
There may have been others... but nobody springs to mind right this second.
Then I had to deal with the fact that Ma was having a panic attack and had called me five times during the afternoon... well, eight actually... five when I actually looked at the phone, then she called twice more, which I killed because I was still inside, then she called a final time once I got outside into the "smoking" area (and, because the Universe is evil, Hot Sweaty Monkey Sex Guy was also out there talking to somebody on his mobile at the time too... except waaaay down the other end). She'd managed to work herself up to a full on tizzy because she'd called me an hour and a half before and I hadn't called her back... according to her she was about to get in the car to drive down to my place to make sure I wasn't dead... freakin drama queen woman. And all because she'd seen something in the video store and wanted to ask me if we wanted it. I'm just glad I decided to check my phone at some point during the afternoon (mostly to check the time, which, because she was all overexcited, I actually forgot to do and had to go back afterwards and have another look), because I didn't trust that they'd remembered to put the clocks at the sauna forward an hour. And of course I couldn't tell her WHY I hadn't answered the phone, so I ended up making a vague reference to being "out". I don't know why TODAY she had to have a freakout... but then that would be that timing thing again, wouldn't it.
Like I said earlier, today was all about my timing being shot to hell...
If I'm being honest it was all just one long exercise in frustration, because I never quite seemed to be in the right place at the right time. To be honest it may have been the case that even if I had been in the right place at the right time it wouldn't have done me any good... but you always assume that it's going to go your way in those situations don't you.
The premium example of that was the guy I mentioned earlier... although I don't know if my interpretation of the events and situation is actually the correct one, since I'm just filling in the blanks and drawing my own conclusions... and we know how well that usually works... The guy in question, although it sounds mean to say, isn't a good look... he just isn't... but at some point he managed to "collect" the youngest, prettiest, thinnest and smoothest (we're talking shaved from the neck down basically) guy. I don't know if they turned up together (and were actually "together" as well), or if he'd just befriended this guy or what the hell the deal was, but it was one of those "I wish that was me" moments... originally I was going to say "that should have been me", but I know that whatever the nature of the relationship between Young & Pretty and Big & Ugly actually is, I'm still just plain jealous... well, unless it turns out that B&U isn't getting into Y&P's pants and it's just an exercise in sexual frustration... those I can do all on my own.
To be honest I actually did some thinking about other random stuff while I was wandering about the sauna aimlessly... the first of which was that I don't often say how something made me FEEL when I blog... I say what happened but I don't know that I always say what I was feeling about it. Or maybe I do and I don't realise it... but the thought process that I had kind of told me that I didn't. I'm not promising I'll completely change my style of blogging, but I want to try and include more of the feeling and thought process if and when I remember.
The other thought process probably took place because I was sitting somewhere I've had the exact same thought process on previous occasions. I was sitting in the spa just watching the bubbles swirling though my hand and just wanted to be writing again. Not writing like this... but, you know... writing writing. On at least two previous occasions sitting in the spa at a sauna (I remember one instance at 431 and one at the other sauna we used to have) has triggered off story ideas... not that you would know it from the finished products... but they did. Although, to be honest, sitting here right now I kind of know why I don't write much beyond this blog anymore... well, other than the fact I ran out of ideas a while back... but I just don't get peace and quiet... well I do... but just not enough of it. But if I follow that thought to it's logical conclusion I'll start off on a whole other rant that everybody has heard before, so we won't go there.
At some point later on I might have to dig out at least the one finished story and have a look at it. Who knows.
So yeah... all in all I'm not quite sure HOW I feel about the events of this afternoon... I think maybe we might thumb through our Word of the Day calendar until we find the word "conflicted"... or maybe "confused"... words beginning with "con" anyway...
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